Tapping Into The Observer Effect
What you notice changes
There’s a concept in quantum physics called the observer effect. The idea that observing something changes it. I first heard Dr. Michael Beckwith talk about this years ago, and while I’m sure there are people far more qualified to explain the science behind it, the emotional and somatic application of it immediately made sense to me. Because I’ve experienced this first hand over and over again in my own life. The moment I start paying attention to something, it begins to shift.
This is especially true in the body.
A lot of my healing journey started in my last relationship. At the time, I thought I was trying to understand him, his communication, the emotional push and pull between us. But eventually I realized the more important thing to pay attention to was what was happening inside of me. I started noticing what happened in my body every time I felt triggered. My entire body vibrated. My stomach would drop and my rumination kicked up. I also felt the urge to over-explain myself and chase clarity.
Before that relationship, I don’t think I fully realized how often I abandoned myself in moments where I felt emotionally unsafe. These reactions were so automatic that I barely questioned them. They felt like personality traits. I thought I was just sensitive, emotional and anxious. But once I started paying attention to my nervous system in real time, I could see that my body had actually been communicating with me constantly. I just hadn’t been listening.
The act of noticing started changing things on its own.
Soon I began responding different because I was aware. Once I could recognize what was happening in my body, I could pause before reacting. And once I became aware of the stories I immediately started telling myself when I felt rejected or disconnected, I stopped treating those stories like objective truth.
This is a huge part of somatic work, and a big part of healing in general. We cannot change patterns we cannot see. Most of us move through life on autopilot, repeating emotional habits and nervous system responses that were built years ago. We think we’re choosing our reactions, but so much of the time we are reenacting old survival strategies.
The body tells the truth long before the mind catches up. It knows when something feels unsafe. It knows when we’re overriding ourselves. It knows when we’re people-pleasing, performing, tolerating, disconnecting, or abandoning our own needs to maintain attachment. But many of us have spent years learning how not to notice those signals. Especially as women and mothers.
What I’ve found is that awareness itself is transformational. When you observe something clearly, you interrupt the unconscious cycle. You create space between the trigger and the reaction. That space is where choice lives.
It’s why in somatic coaching we focus so much on noticing. Notice what happens in your body when you say yes but mean no. Notice your breathing when conflict arises. Notice the tension in your jaw during certain conversations. Notice the urge to leave yourself emotionally when someone else becomes uncomfortable. Notice the exhaustion that comes from constantly overriding your own needs. I tell my clients to:
Notice it.
Feel it.
Move it.
The sequence has changed my life.
And the observer effect extends far beyond relationships. Once I started paying attention to my nervous system and emotional patterns in one area of my life, I started seeing them everywhere. I noticed where I shrank professionally. How often I disconnected from my own desires before I could even articulate them. The ways I performed competence while silently feeling overwhelmed. How difficult it was for me to fully receive support. And how often my body knew something long before my mind admitted it.
Awareness can feel uncomfortable because it removes our ability to pretend we don’t know. Once you see a pattern, it becomes much harder to unconsciously continue participating in it. But awareness is also the beginning of freedom. Because when you can witness yourself with honesty and compassion, you stop being consumed by the pattern itself.
That’s what I love so much about Dr. Michael Beckwith’s teachings around the observer effect. He talks about moving from unconscious creation into conscious participation. It has resonated with me because healing, for me, has not been about becoming a different person. It has been about becoming more conscious of how I move through the world, how I relate, protect myself, and disconnect from myself when I’m afraid.
The body is always communicating. The question is whether we’re willing to pay attention long enough to hear it.
And maybe healing doesn’t begin when everything changes. Maybe it begins the moment we finally stop looking away.
Take care,
An Invitation
I offer private 1:1 somatic clarity sessions for women navigating chronic stress, burnout, self-doubt, or feeling stuck. These sessions are designed to help you slow down, reconnect with your body, and uncover what’s underneath the overwhelm so you can move forward with more clarity, calm, and self-trust.
You can learn more or book a session here.
About Me
I’m Shanetta McDonald, a somatic life coach, writer, and veteran publicist who’s a guide for folks learning to live more fully in their truth. Over the past decade, I’ve helped shape the stories of changemakers, creatives, and mission-driven brands. Now, I help people—especially women—release perfection, reconnect with their bodies, and rewrite the narratives that no longer serve them.
Whether you’re a high-achiever learning to soften, a mother reclaiming herself, or a creative trying to find your voice again, you’re in the right place. My work is rooted in nervous system awareness, embodied storytelling, and the belief that your inner wisdom already knows the way.
Book your FREE introductory call today.