How To Identify Limiting Beliefs
And why that belief might not even be yours
Think About It
“The master key of knowledge is, indeed, a persistent and frequent questioning.” – Peter Abelard
There was a time when I believed every thought I had. It wasn’t as if I consciously told myself to believe my thoughts, I just did. If I told myself, “you’re not doing enough… you just need to lose weight… keep pushing/going/trying/forcing etc.,” I listened.
I rarely questioned whether those thoughts were true, or if they were mine to begin with. I took them as truth, when really, many of them were just societal conditioning.
Stories I inherited from my family, culture, trauma and hell… even TV. Beliefs that shaped by what I saw and survived.
This is the power of a limiting belief: it feels like fact, but it’s actually just a thought you’ve practiced so many times that its baked into your nervous system. Like Daria Burke writes in Of My Own Making, “The more we repeat a behavior or tell ourselves a story, the more potential this story has to become our reality—for better or for worse.”
That line stopped me in my tracks when I listened to it in the audiobook AND when I bought the book and read it (because the cover is just so damn cute).
Daria was right. Our brains wire around repetition. But our bodies? Our bodies tell the deeper truth.
How to Identify a Limiting Belief
If you’re feeling stuck, disconnected, or like you’re living a life that doesn’t quite feel like your own, there’s likely a limiting belief running the show. Here’s how I guide clients (and myself) through identifying them:
1. Start with the symptom.
Where do you feel stuck or anxious right now?
What pattern keeps repeating in your life, even though you want to shift it? What does this feel like in your body (e.g., shallow breath, tense shoulders, etc.)
2. Ask: What’s the story here?
What thoughts come up in this place of stuckness? What are you telling yourself?
e.g.,: “I always mess this up.” “I’m not ready.” “I have to do this alone.”
3. Get curious, not combative.
Instead of shaming the belief, get curious:
– Where did this belief come from?
– Is this thought true for me>
– What might it be protecting me from?
4. Try on a new thought.
Now, I’m not telling you to leap to toxic positivity. Just try something a little softer.
e.g.,: “It’s possible I don’t have to do this alone.”
Or “I’ve made mistakes before — and I’ve still grown.”
5. Let your body be the truth-teller.
When you say the new thought out loud, what shifts in your body? What sensations bubble up? More breath? Less tension? That’s your cue it’s resonating.
Why This Matters
When you rewrite your beliefs, you’re not just shifting your mind, you’re shifting your nervous system. It’s giving your body a new experience of safety. Of choice. Of freedom.
It’s also what makes this week’s Your Body Knows podcast episode with Daria Burke so powerful.
In our conversation, the author shares how a single photograph (and years of healing work) led her to reexamine the beliefs that shaped her entire identity. Her memoir, Of My Own Making, is both lyrical and deeply researched, exploring the way trauma wires the brain and how we can consciously shape who we become.
She writes:
“The more we repeat a behavior or tell ourselves a story, the more potential this story has to become our reality—for better or for worse.”
It’s a reminder that healing doesn’t always start with a breakthrough.
Sometimes, it starts with a question:
Is this thought even true?
New Episode 🎙️
We are back!
And our first conversation, Rewriting the Narrative: Healing, Neuroplasticity, and Owning Your Story with Author Daria Burke is now live.
Daria Burke has lived many lives—fashion executive, C-suite leader, trauma survivor, and now, debut author. In this powerful conversation, Daria opens up about the moments that shaped her new memoir Of My Own Making and the healing journey that unfolded in the process. From growing up in poverty with an absent father and a mother battling addiction, to finding freedom through therapy, neuroscience, and deep self-examination, Daria reminds us that we are not our origin stories, we are who we choose to become. This episode explores trauma, resilience, reparenting, and the science behind post-traumatic growth. If you’ve ever wondered whether you can rewrite your story, Daria is proof that you can.
Dig into the episode here.
About Me
I’m Shanetta McDonald, a somatic life coach, writer, and former publicist turned guide for folks learning to live more fully in their truth. Over the past decade, I’ve helped shape the stories of changemakers, creatives, and mission-driven brands. Now, I help people—especially women—release perfection, reconnect with their bodies, and rewrite the narratives that no longer serve them.
Whether you’re a high-achiever learning to soften, a mother reclaiming herself, or a creative trying to find your voice again, you’re in the right place. My work is rooted in nervous system awareness, embodied storytelling, and the belief that your inner wisdom already knows the way.
You can find me on Instagram and on my podcast Your Body Knows, where I explore healing, identity, and the many ways we come home to ourselves.